Sunday, October 26, 2014

Finnish adventure extraordinaire

I really wanted this trip to end first before i actually wrote a new post. But almost 15 days is way too much.

As my friend is casually pricing her unwanted clothes for a sale in a local flea market I though i would actually be useful. So i cleaned the dishes, washed the cups and polished the forks. And i thought about writing.

So here i am, at 2:16 am in Turku, Finland trying to reflect of the things i did so far in my first 4 days here.

Not much happened between the last post and traveling. Actually i sucked in the last exam, but that is alright since I am going to drop that class for something that is actually worth my time.

The only noteworthy thing is pretending to study for the exam with Jaime, when instead we were actually shooting green-eyed monsters to space with some things that resembled a spaceship and get them into orbit (Portuguese engineering bro!). The game was called Kerbal Space Program and it was fun seeing Jaime fume in frustration as he tried to crash his ship into the sun and make frankestein-ships that crashed meters after launching. I will also never forget his reaction when he just set the launch zone on fire and created an atomic bomb crater. Good job man.

Then we went for a walk in the city. More like biking with whatever was left of Marley. We went for a crapburger at MAX's and i got pickles in mine, which sucked because i specifically asked for no pickles. The baboon laughed at me but life is a bitch so i would take revenge soon. Hihihi.

We are off so he can buy a present for his girlfriend. We venture hopelessly in a store that sells accessories and after many fake jewels and even more shiny owls we get in a store that has actually nice stuff. He picks something after a lot of Mediterranean whining and we wait 15 minutes next to the counter. So i tell the owner of the store that if his girlfriend does not like the earrings then he should wear them to the exam tomorrow because they will match his eyes. He burst in to laughter, called me an idiot and we had more fun.

Oh, Marley died. I am very proud of him because he died exactly when i wanted him to. The rear wheel was shattered exactly when i reached town to get my bus card for Finland. He got me to the examination building before. He endured and then just let go near the ending. Good boy. He is currently left next to the cafeteria next to the river, or so i hope, because he is not even worth scraps. Take care Marley.

It is the last day and i have to be at the airport around 5:40 as my plane leaves at 6:40. That means i have to take the bus from Uppsala at least at 5:00 and be there earlier since i live far away from the center.

So i pack my clothes and do random crap. I have a 1 hour bath and i have not slept at all. The time is 2 am and i do not sleep:
  1. because i am an idiot
  2. because i will probably lose my flight
Hoping i will get the first bus at 3:56 i wait at the bus stop listening to some music. I make it to the center at 4:15 and the bus leaves at 4:33 am. My god it is so cold. I wait at bus stop for number 801 to Arlanda. It leaves every :33 and :03 minutes.

There is this tiny petite thailand girl there and i get into a short boring chat with her just to pass some time. We talk about thailand and the cold weather and her working in MAX's in the airport. She was 19 years old.

The bus ride is nice, as it is so warm and clean and so cozy so i try to sleep a bit. But already i am in arlanda in terminal 5 so i blaze towards the PressbyrÄn and devour 2 kanelbullars.

Apparently it is very easy to leave Sweden as i just printed my boarding pass and never had to show any kind of identity. I find a nice bench to die for a few minutes and casually wait for the boarding.

Waiting sleepless for the airplane.
I finally make it to the airplane, i stuff my small handbag in the upper storage and there i am sitting next to 2 french guys. My god i wanted to kill myself and punch them in the throat. One of them was singing Last Christmas i gave you my heart with ze mozt horrible acczent and the other one was mumbling until time stood still. I look at my watch. Only 10 minutes have passed. Dear lord.

I told him to shut up and he muttered something in french. I told him that i understand you you mongrel and he kept singing. Then Holger's picture was all over my head.

Something along these lines, but with a moose.
We finally arrive. I can't wait to get out of the god forsaken airplane. And the next 3 minutes until the doors open are a nightmare. These guys just don't shut up. And i get down the stairs and see them in front of me. Good grief.

I go outside the terminal and follow the crown. I get to a dead end and everything is just so confusing. I call Carita and tell her i am just outside terminal one. She says she is in terminal 2 which is like a kilometer in the other direction. Cry me a river Kostas, you wanted an adventure no? At least i had some nice things to see on the way.

One can always be happy when it involves chocolate!
There we are on our way to Turku. We have some chitchat and i am on the verge of dying from sleep deprivation. But it so fun and it is so beautiful outside, full of forests and rocks and water. And apparently there are signs that say *Watch out for the mooses*. 

Turku is a small town of around 100000 people in the southwest part of Finland and everything is also written in Swedish since it's some sort of the second official language. It took us around 1.5 hour to get there. We immediately slept for hours.

Her lovely dog Ippu was so scared of me in the beginning. She is so shy with strangers. 4 days on and she is sleeping on my feet in the time of writing. Yay.

Sweet Ippu, the lovely Shetland Sheepdog.
The first day was really casual then with the only thing worth noting was our dinner in a nice cozy student restaurant called Kerttu where we had fantastic food like a chicken spicy pasta. And then we slept again for so long.

The next day was more adventurous i guess as i had my first walk in the town center. I sat around in the local mall where i had more chocolate and coffee to kickstart my day with a smile.

Yummy right?
Then i was introduced to the local McDonald's like shops of fast food, Hesburger. I find it quite funny because if you translate it in Greek it can mean shitburger. But they were actually pretty decent quality and i was a happy panda after eating.

You could translate this into you will shit kebab. Lol.
Then we moved to the famous Ittala crystal designers and i bought stuff for my sister and my friend Afroditi.

The central square of Turku.
The town is pretty and i took pictures everywhere, however i cannot use all of them from my digital camera right now, so i will update later or just ninja them in a future post. This is more of a photo album from now on until the end actually. Visit Finland, it is worth it. Oh it is also very very cold, like -5 to 0 Celcius usually so dress warm, winter is coming.

There is always a river it seems! Just like Uppsala.
Friday i had some spare time so i just walked alone towards the center. It was around 2.5km from the student apartments so i walked in like 20 minutes there. I also saw a nice graffiti on a wall.

Such a nice view and artistic expression.
I met another friend, sweet Olka and we had a lovely cup of coffee in Robert's Cafe downtown. She is a lovely mother of 2 and a great person. Do not piss her off because she has biceps of steel! Thank you for the fantastic day Olka!

There is something majestic about the churches in Scandinavia.
She also took me to the library where i took even more pictures, taking my total tally to over 150 in 3 days.

What a lovely library and everything so quiet.
I went home and we took Ippu for a walk, then visited the old Turku Castle. It was very windy so we didn't stay long there.

Speechless by the scenery really.
Scattered around the garden were also small wooden houses that were inhabited by people back then. Can't beat a classic.

Imaging living there.
Back home again and my friend cooked me a delicious spicy chicken risotto to die for. I thanked her so much and slept happy like a cat.

Saturday, the day of the El Clasico and i did not give a shit about it. I have so much fun here and i feel so free and unchained. I just walk the dog, have fun, watch movies and eat. I eat a lot. Today we bought a huge bag of candies and we ate into Blanko, another overpriced restaurant where i ate papardelles with chicken thigh and vegetables. We then went to a bar downtown called Papu, where we drank sangria and sat on slings. It was mexican and i guess i look very young because the bartender asked for my ID.

I think i should sleep now because it is 3:21 am.

Goodnight Sweden. Goodnight Finland. See you soon! I expect your comments and opinions!

Halloween is coming!

Friday, October 17, 2014

Avengers: Disassemble

This week has been full of ups and downs as usual. But boy oh boy, i am going to keep soaring up towards the limitless sky now that i am free.

I didn't do a lot of great things since my last melodramatic post. The most notable part was on Sunday, when i went along with Despoina, Orla, Patrizia, Cecilia, Laura to the oldest town in Sweden, Sigtuna. I will get back to that story later, i will do a recap for now.

We woke up early to go to the V-dala Brunch, where you pay 70 crowns and you can eat as much as your stomach can hold. From fake pasta to meatballs to chocolate cakes and muffins, cheese, bread, butter and raspberry and the mandatory coffee or juice. Actually the buffet was not that great that day and i was left trying to swallow the cold pasta that reminded me of the army food.

Apparently Despoina looked forward to leaving soon too!

Where are thou? Shall we drink some tea?
We go outside and walk towards the train station. I left Marley at D's house. The others joined us by bike. The train left at 13:11 and we managed to miss it. Fantastic now we had to wait one more hour. We were supposed to get the train to Marsta and from there pick up the bus to Sigtuna. So the little dictator guided us back to the city and we entered a mall. A woman's heaven actually because it was full of shoes and bags and jeans and accessories and dozens of cute cashiers who i was eyeballing not so discretely. For the love of god when we entered that place with the various aromas i wanted to gouge my eyes and feed them to the dogs. It made me feel sick for some reason.

So this time we make it to the train in time. I just played some Rayman to kill some time we discussed a bit and before we knew it we made it to the Marsta station. In the pressbyran i got some fantastic pink cinnamon bullar that was soft and fresh and i wanted 30 more.

We found out we had to take bus 570 or 575 and we stayed at the bus stop for like 30 minutes. It started raining and half of us didn't have an umbrella. The horror.

Little group meeting. Cecilia, Patrizia, Laura, Despoina, Orla from left to right.
We finally get on 570. We ask the polite lady in the front where should we get off and she says she will show us. I went into limbo listening to my own style of music, thinking about the things i did wrong. Watch out where you express your feelings people. The downfall can be really big. I am experienced now and i can deal with it. You, watch out for the pitfalls.

We make it to the little town. Built around 980 it's the oldest town in sweden. The rain starts more heavily. I crawl under Cecilia's umbrella and we all race towards the old town hall. Amazingly preserved, it had a room dating back to 1800's and it had no lights in order to keep it natural. People can get married there actually.

Outside...
...and inside.
Moving on we traversed trough the breathtaking scenery and the old roads, with the air and atmosphere so peaceful and clean, where you could only hear the drops of raining crashing against the tarmac and our umbrellas and beating down the autumn leaves from the trees.

So pretty!

And there was a small road, with a carpet made from fallen leaves, leading to a majestic old cafe from centuries ago. Everything here felt like it was brought back to life from another era, an era of chivalry, peace and love. And let's not forget the perfect grandma on the entrance.

Welcome to Sweden!
We moved on and on and it felt so quiet. We crossed roads without cars until we made it to the pier where boats where casually residing there and the waves splashed them with passion. The sights were spectacular and if you desire peace and quiet, this is the place to live.

Welcome to Eden...
We walked backwards towards the big church, surrounded by a graveyard. It's a strange thing in Sweden, even a graveyard can look spectacular. We also took the mandatory pictures.

Me and the Eskimo :)
Moving back we ran to get the bus. We took 575 this time. Back in Marsta then, listening to more music. I traveled to places far away from space and time, fueled by adrenaline and passion. After all i am going to Finland this wednesday to see my friends.

That was it pretty much. The rest of the week involved crushing my heart, recovering, studying A LOT and presenting a GIS project today about the landslides in Guantanamo, Cuba. We also lost Ippu, my friends lovely dog who i love so much and luckily we found her too.

Sweet baby, please don't scare me again.
About the presentation? Wow we are like the bad brothers of the Avengers. We assembled to create chaos and destruction and laugh until our eyes explode. Yesterday we had to make the presentation and we were for 10 hours in the GIS lab. I wonder how they did not kick us out. From throwing papers to calling Sandra a good dog to sending gif's and hairy nude men, Holger almost cried. Jaime looked like a mad scientist ready to flip out murmuring stuff about rasters and layers and facepalming. Sandra was red like the priest from our village church when he drank too much red wine.

Today at the presentation it was even more hilarious. We forgot something and i changed the slide and Jaime the baboon casually screams "Not that slide you idiot!" and i laughed so hard. Amazing i tell you!

But but now i am preparing for my trip to Finland and Turku! I will be back before the weekend with more horrible stories! As always, subscribe, like and share please! Closing in with the required grandma selfie.

Bye Sweden!

Why so serious?

Saturday, October 11, 2014

Let it come streamline, let it come in time..

First of all i want to say thank you one more time for the love and the comments and support! I received affection from people i never thought i would and countless others i don't even know about. As we are approaching 10000 readers today i thought i should mention that. Phoebe your message touched me too. Thanks!

I had a blast these past days. I didn't go out that much but the times i did i took Uppsala by storm. I am on a quest here, a quest not for the past but for tomorrow to make it last. To suck you in the dreamland of Uppsala and Sweden. The best way to walk this life, hand in hand with me, a dreamer. Enter my dreams and follow me, don't stay awake, our dreams remain, they only break. So forget the task and enjoy the ride, simply follow me into the night..

Beautiful Autumn
So our quest starts this Wednesday in the morning when i woke up at 8:40 to meet Jaime and bike our way to the university. I failed to show up so in true Top Gear style he abandoned me and went alone. We sat on the back with Holger. When we are together we are like an unstable concoction ready to explode into laughter and sarcasm.

We were supposed to ask questions for the upcoming exam on Friday, which sadly (or for the best) i had none. So we spent our time runescaping and conversing and giggling. I just can't forget just before the presentation of our synthesis report i wrote on the board that Holger likes to do the chacha like a sissy girl and i had to run like the Flash to erase it before Christian (the prof) got into the room. He is the perfect mixture of knowledge, funny and serious professor. Best choice Uppsala University!

So after that we had 3 hours before the next GIS lab. So we spent it creatively on the couches of the university.
Doing the Holger
The idiotic things that we said and the jokes we exchanged were of C-Movie quality and at times i felt like climbing the Everest with a toothpick. Holger you and your GIF's are like a firework.

So it's time for lab 5. Matlab. Kill me now, after struggling to understand the basics of ArcGIS now i have to learn to use this. I complained for hours as usual, watched in utter humiliation as Jaime was racing through it but in the end i actually understood what to do until the end.

It's 6 and i have to drag my sorry ass to the Swedish class in the Engelska park. I am down to 13% battery on my tablet. The horror. I go in the class, completely unprepared and i share books with a girl from somewhere with a name of something. Nothing to see here folks! 2% battery and 2 hours later i finally can go home. As usual in the middle of the first song the mp3 player dies.

It's raining and soaking wet and i see a homeless man begging for money outside the ICA. I give him 8 crowns because i really feel sorry for him. I go in the supermarket and buy some basic stuff so i don't die from hunger. I pay, tell the cashier that she is very pretty and as i go out the beggar asks me for money again. He sees me and says "Oh it's you"......

Thursday is upon us.

The colors, the freedom, the sentiment
I got no class. I am supposed to study. I cook around 2-3pm and study until 01:30 am relentlessly. 400 slides of powerpoint, 20 articles, 4 lab exercises and seminars. My brain is like a carbon source, degassing information instead of storing it. Everything sounds a bit dull right? But what can i do? Man's gotta study too! But let's move on to the good part. What, did you think that Friday was going to be boring too? Hah!

Waking up at 7 am i managed to get dressed somehow and bike to meet Jaime in the usual spot. We went through the woods towards the examination buildings. They use separate buildings for exams, with 3-4 invigilators in each room. Unthinkable for Greek standards.

We park our bikes and i laugh so hard at Jaime because karma slapped him in the face as he fell down the stairs.  You baboon. Anyways we try to find the building we are supposed to get into and we follow a pretty girls butt hoping she knows. Apparently she was clueless and we made our way back. Oh there's Erik, at last a familiar face! We get inside and there are dozens of lockers to leave coats and your mobiles.

The room is massive. There are like 8-10 rows of desks for one person perfectly aligned one behind the other. There is a set of instructions on top that go along these lines:
  1. Do not cheat.
  2. If you cheat we will get you.
  3. Do not use mobile phones.
  4. Do not talk or you will be disqualified.
  5. You idiot should have brought food with you.
Number 5 was my invention, because i failed as usual to bring even water and the exam was 5 hours long, from 8-13:00. We see Kostas who is joking that he will fail and he doesn't care and that next time he will go to the bathroom, pretend he is taking a dump and cheat. Paulo is still anxious and Marie pretends to understand stuff. Even Jaime was a bit nervous. Only i have Ataraxia it seems, a lucid state of robust tranquility. I am characterized by ongoing freedom from distress and worry.

We get the papers with the questions. 12 questions, answer 10. Essay style, one page each answer. I take a quick look. I feel confidence brimming through my head and a devious sardonic smile starts taking shape. Game on.

I write 9 questions perfectly, because i was not sure about the other 3. It's all good. I finished in 2.5 hours and i start to leave. The others looked distressed and like they were midway through. Holger went through tendonitis and 3 pens before he finished. Before i left i just looked around. People brought lunches, Monster drinks, water, food, a girl next to me was practically having a picnic as she had a small basket of food, water, juice and yogurt. I then looked at my desk and saw a pen, yellow paper and my intestines eating themselves to maintain my spirit from going to another dimension.

Time to hit the road. Head out on the highway and look for some adventure. But before that some pictures of the examination buildings.

This is the tune of the week
So i find Marley and we bike towards my house. I decide i have to get food so i go to the local mall to buy food. I get pizza, pasta, milk, creme, fruits, chips and some drinks. I get home and i talk a bit with Despoina to set up a meeting later on for a beer or so. We agree to meet at 20:30 outside the usual Fika place. Ι sleep for a bit to have some energy.

It's 8 and i have to go. I reluctantly dress and sweat my way to Storkens where i find Despoina waiting at 8:34. Before i even get to her i give up and die on a concrete bench outside a kebab place. She tells me "You look horrible". Encouraging bestie! Thanks!

We decide to go to Varmlands Nation as the entrance before 9 is 20 crowns only. There is no line and we get inside. We leave our coats as it's free to unhappy indian people and we go upstairs. There is no music or dancing yet. There are some people in every room and Mattias seems to have shaved his head from the Heihachi Mishima era to a bald egg with a chicken ready to sprout out of it. I laughed so hard when he hugged Despoina and made her pat his baldie :D Everyone is dressed again, it is hilarious i will ninja photos between the paragraphs!

I don't know their names, but they posed so many times for me!
We meet Laura and Patrizia and Cecilia and in the end we sit down with them and we plan a trip to the oldest village in Sweden for Sunday. Laura is one of the prettiest girls i have seen in Sweden so far. Her boyfriend is coming again in the 1st of November, talk about dedication and love!

I see KevinFuckthegoverment in the other room gaming two girls. I go there and introduce myself to help him and be his wing. Two girls from France there. He is not doing that good so i pick him up and we go to the smoking area. He wants a smoke so i tell him to pick up a seat and sit with some random people.

Barney? Spyro the Dragon?
So we end up in a table with 4 girls and a guy. Bryan is from the Netherlands and is really a cool guy. The other girl is a blonde angel named Kiiiiraaaa from Finland. She is interesting and sweet and i keep talking to her a lot. I will meet her sometime.

Kira and Bryan
Oh i also saw Ida for the first time without her greek goddess costume. I managed to recognize her because she is so beautiful with or without the dress. I don't have a picture but she is breathtaking i can tell you that.

Kevin goes in the bathroom and i wait for 20 minutes he is nowhere to be found...So i go back up to find Despoina and we move to the other floor where people dance and have fun. My ankle is still sore and the music is terrible for me so i just drink a beer taking photos of people with or without me. I girl in a kimono told me Nej when i wanted a picture so i told her to buy a glass of bitch.

More random crazy swedish people!
We end up with a guy from Guatemala talking and ready to make our exit. There is a guy with a massive white turtleneck trying to hit on Kira it's so funny. I called him Dr. Zhivago. We go towards the coat area. Despoina made me smell her jacket. It smelled great and was so fluffy because she poured half the conditioner on it! I turn around and...

Handz me ze paperz or i zill exzecutez you!
Despoina is on the other end of a massive intergallactic hug attack from Mattias and we leave the nation. We pick up Marley and we pass through a flower place with strange decorations. Picture soon. I walk her home because I am a great guy and i start making my way home. There is no message from my russian angel. But i will leave one for her.

When everything is said and done
To looking for answers if only one
Turn my back the urge has gone
Left with no reason we come undone

What are you waiting for?
Just surrender here tonight
What are you waiting for?
As we go towards the light

We will go towards the light baby.

Dafuq?
As i park outside my garage i feel the breeze stroking my hair. I finally feel free. It's a land of pleasures and fun and interest and a ton of amazing things to do and witness.

I wish we could take this to heart. A land where imagination rules and wandering the world could be a dream that will come true. To traverse the planet and uncover the most sacred places on foot alone. May we see the night when we live for the now. Blessed be, sleeping Dreamers.

I am expecting more comments, love and sharing! I love your comments!

Have a great weekend Sweden

Monday, October 6, 2014

Rise of the Phoenix

It has been one of those days again that make you feel trapped into a game. Like the Truman Show. Where someone is overseeing your progress, toying with your life, your future and most importantly, your emotions. If i hadn't been able to get on the plane and come to Sweden, i would be excused to think that i am actually living in a reality show, or a god simulation game where there is a giant invisible hand above me watching my every move, plotting another adventure scenario each day.

I am going to tell you a story today. A story from my recent past, the days of my last true love. Days where pain and suffering overtook me daily, where acid tears glided like rivers in my cheeks right out of my eyes until i had no more strength or tears to shed. Why? Because for the first time after 7 years i felt how it is to feel love for someone again. And because it is very complicated for me it reminded me of the days i spent in the army.

As i walk the streets of Uppsala and see all those people and couples that enjoy these tender moments i just can't help but remember how that felt, how the loss of my dog and my love affected my life and my choices, how i ended up in Sweden and how i actually hugged my sister for the first time after 19 years. It's not all fun and games, though i might talk about what happened yesterday and today. We shall see fellow babies.

It took me years to stand on my feet again.
It was 26th of November 2012. I was in the general army camp of Avlona, one of the biggest gathering camps in Greece and the Balkans. I just had learned 5 days ago that the first and only love of my life, my shinning star, caring mother of our baby dog had found a new person to love.

The blame was shared, i did some wrong moves, motivated by jealousy, pain, suffering, being engulfed in a sea of strange people i did not want with me, taking orders from despicable human beings with no respect for the fellow man or any humility, enforcing their opinions, rotten opinions and commands that we were supposed to follow, not by respect, but out of fear.

That day was supposed to be a happy one. Relatives and family from all over the country flocked in the army camp to share some moments with their beloved children. It was a day where all of them were invited and for the new recruits to let off some steam and see some familiar faces.

The walk from the camp was long, about 15 minutes until the entrance. I remember the last time i got there, trying to get some food delivered from the famous "The recruit's cantina".

My legs were so heavy. Burdened by the weight of expectation, of failure and shattered memories, i was enveloped by the abyss. I was mechanically carrying a chair in order for my sister to sit. She was the one that would come and see me that day. If everything was well Alexandra would be here. Every step i took i thought i would fall down and nobody would pick me up and take me out of there. Away from the bottom of the barrel.

I saw happy faces everywhere, soldiers that cheered up, ready to have the day off and relax. But i also saw faces like mine. Drenched in fear and loneliness, a doom and gloom of cataclysmic proportions covering their faces, their skins pale as a ghost, their spirit weakened, ready to depart towards the spiritual world.

I had reached an all time low of 68 kilos. In less than two weeks since my enlistment during my birthday, i went from 77 to 68 kilos from the misery, the tears, the lack of food and support and my lack of willpower for life. As much as love can make you do superhuman things and defy all odds, its death can make you feel empty, black and insignificant and make you bleed all the joy out of you. And that day did not help. Not in the way it unraveled...

Getting in the woods, marching towards the entrance you could hear life and laughter echoing. The first influx of visitors had arrived. I was scared of what i would see. We finally made it to the gathering point, a place of sheer beauty, with short grass and wooden tables and benches next to the historical artillery and tanks of the Greek army.

A short look around me was enough to crush my knees and break the fragile wall of self-esteem i had recovered during the past days. Happy people running towards their loved ones. Almost every soldier had his girlfriend visiting, a person that genuinely cared for them. I remember one running with 2 chairs in his arms for 100 meters, sprinting to hug his girlfriend down the road. He dropped the chairs on the ground and lifted her like a piece of cloth, spun her around then they shared the most passionate kiss i had seen for the past years.

I remember the inner struggles, the titanic strength i mustered not to cry and break down there. I felt weak and vulnerable, jealous and unsure if i would feel the same again. My sister would arrive in 30 minutes. My mind was broken and my thoughts numbed. I felt lobotomized. I would take the wrong choice once more.

Right next to the picnic area there was a tiny hilltop with a tarmac road slashing it in the edges. I lost my chair somewhere but i did not care. I sat there on the edges alone, a forlorn figure once more. I kept watching happy people hugging and kissing everywhere around me. I found myself calling Alexandra's number...i had to say something. We were barely talking, she was cold as ice and the last time she cried about me was when i told her about the ring.

I remember her saying "hi how are you?" like she was talking to a stranger. I started talking, saying how i felt and how i hoped things were different. How i hoped i would sleep and everything would be normal again. How i witnessed everyone around me being proud and happy. I remember telling her that i saw almost everyone with their girlfriends and that they were so immensely happy...and her replying that she did not believe me.

I cried for 30 minutes, trying to remain unseen. Tears flooded my eyes, that became sore. I was muttering words and phrases in pauses, because i was not able to cope with the sobbing and the pain. I remember saying that i felt plagued by death and that i had a dream. A dream that i once saw her in the street and i greeted her. And that she replied to me by saying "Who are you? Do i know you?" I woke up sweaty and frightened that night.

It's funny how they say that dreams are mere illustrations of what we really want and crave, or that sometimes they can even predict the future. Because fast forward January 2014 i called her to see my beloved dog and see replied "Who are you?". That is the last time i ever saw my dog and the last contact i will ever have with Alexandra. I have to admit that every 6 months i enter her profile page and steal one of my dogs pictures, to see that Flicka is well and beautiful.

I miss you baby...
I bombarded the phone with phrases of pain. At least i am not an emotionless robot. "I had no idea you felt that way" she said. That did nothing to comfort me. She would never understand....

Then we hung up, i had to try and recover. I sat with some people from my hometown and their families and girlfriends. They fed me and tried to cheer me up, because i looked like a human wreck. And i would have been even worse if there was not a special person that proved the cornerstone and my mentor in this toughen-up adventure. We will talk about her later.

My sister came. She brought me some supplies from mom and she bought me some water and apple juice from the cantina. She asked me if i am well and i pretended to be so. She could probably see  through it, but i had to fake it. Time passed and the visitors had to start leaving. Then i hugged my sister for the first time in 19 years. I had to remove the poisonous feelings of vulnerability and banish my lack of family love and embrace it for the first time. I am sorry if i am a horrible person sometimes mom. I love you all.

Then i saw a guy that looked like me. Alone and drown in sorrow. I picked up his chair and patted him in the shoulder and told him "Be brave". A small smile was carved in his cheeks and he said thank you. I never saw him again, nor i ever learned his name. I hope you are good friend.

The long journey to redemption started. Baby steps one at a time. I cried for 6 months. But it's ok there is no bad blood. I am better than that. But man that journey was rough. As i walked towards the sunset i thought about the past and all those wonderful memories closed in that tightly sealed box inside the corners of my brain. I had an epiphany, the sun was setting, but in a few hours it would rise again. And i would rise as a phoenix, with wings of fire leaving behind the scorched earth and rising towards the sun, to fly high and with such vigor and ferocity, to take the world by storm. I will take over the world, prepare yourselves for me...

At this point my journal entry ends. There is only one person left to talk about. I will not say her name, though she perfectly knows who she is. I would probably would not have made it was it not her support through the dark times i found myself walking through. She supported me from the first moment, even though she knew me barely. But from the little bit i knew about her, from that aura of positivity and kindness i witnessed...when all hell broke loose, i called her. And she listened to me, a practically strange man. She talked to me almost everyday, she helped me pull through and recover mentally. She advised me and told me better days will come. That if i can outbox 25kg heavier people in the ring i can surely tackle them outside in life as well. She told me that she would take me out when i returned home and that i would meet the hottest women through her. Hell she even made me laugh a bit with phrases like these. It has been two years almost and i am sure i will never forget her name or her contribution to my development.

So Thank You and when i die and leave this place after many many decades, i will be proud to say that i was your friend. You may not know it, but every Easter i lighted a candle for you in church. I wish you a placid sleep and a great weekend.

Let's get ready for the grand finale.
These words were written in tough times. I guess i explode on paper. I know which people are close to me...the rest of you can fuck off. If you crossed me and made me bleed, think about it, it's a shame.
There's no easy way out, no shortcut. It's not nice, i smile rarely lately and i don't sleep well. I don't have many news to share and i have distanced my self from my friends in Uppsala. I feel like ice, ready to break. The land of tears is a strange place and it's my fault that i visit it often.

I am gathering strength within me to transform, because i learned to give love so don't be scared princess, i will be there if you need me, remember that...I have the impression that some people do not respect me as a human, shame on you you have become frozen machines, lost into electronic addresses losing the way back home. I wonder if i should be sad or happy. I am writing what i think because i cannot hold it inside me.

Goodnight Sweden.Your feedback is important to me, so please share, subscribe or leave me a comment with your thoughts or what would you like to see in the future! Take care!

And remember. It ain't about how hard ya hit. It's about how hard you can get it and keep moving forward. How much you can take and keep moving forward.

Mina Flicka....




Saturday, October 4, 2014

If I can't hear your hearbeat it's because you are too far away...

It has been another weird week, coming to an end.

My last post proved to be a hit beyond imagination. But i did have loads to say and share. I hoped you enjoyed reading through my content, some of the messages and comments i received were heartwarming and unexpected!

So sorry for the hiatus of posts, as exam period is approaching fast and i just finished writing another report about GIS that revolved around the Uppsala River, FyrisÄn. The river spans from the north until Lake MÀlaren. The river passes through Uppsala and is a place of great importance and Scandinavian lore, as great Viking battles took place here! Tomorrow I hope i can take my angel and watch the annual rowing contest between Uppsala and Lund!

Who said magic does not exist?
I have been a bad boy lately. And along with my despicable comrades Jaime, Holger and recently Marie the french girl we have been so bad that we are joking that karma will avenge us. And every day it actually does. Today was my turn once more! But that's a story for later, let's kick it up a notch with the incredible Botanical Garden! You can run, chill, eat, relax, study here it's breathtaking.

Looks like a palace instead.
Monday as usual was a day of lectures. We moved to Jaime's favorite territory, the Geosphere. Practically earthquakes, volcanoes, rocks for you normal folks! The first 2 hours were normal. But man the next 2 were a rollercoaster. Justin Bieber gave his place to a man that sold drugs, according to Holger (he is a good teacher, but we are horrible). So i spent the next 2 hours making Holger explode from trying to prevent his not so discrete laughs from bursting out in the room.

We discussed the windmill, Marley, i asked him to loan me money from his wallet (which he lost in his previous karma attack), we talked about opium and his daughters stupidity as well as the newly created PC game, Baboon Simulator 2017. He also showed me the most idiotic webpage i have ever seen in my life: I love you like a fat lady loves apples. Why? Why does this exist? Oh well, it's Holger, he loves to proCATinate. He particularly loves cat 62.

I went to the local ICA to buy a drink, some cheese and bread, yogurt and chips. Then i Marley'd my way back home listening to some drums n bass tunes. 
 
Since i share everything here i will say that i was thinking about running the marathon with my angel. We were first and in the last 200 meters she twisted her ankle. I stopped and looked back, like 500 meters the next athlete was coming. I could have won but i wanted us to finish together. So i picked her up around my waist and overcame my pain and tiredness. We won the race and after the finish line i put her down, i dropped on my knees while the crowd cheered and clapped, and she gave me the worlds most loving kiss and i put my hands on her cheeks. Ah time passed fast until home.

Along these lines..
I texted her as usual. I care for her well-being. And i went to sleep. Happy. Oh i also missed swedish class. I was not in the mood to learn that day.

Then i wake up in Tuesday. I am supposed to meet Jaime and Holger in the GIS lab to do some project work, a task that is becoming increasingly difficult due to sucking and trolling. At 12ish we had a meeting with the project director for information on how to register for the spring classes. I picked 2 from Hydrology, 1 from Paleobiology and one from the Ekonomikum, entrepreneurship so i can learn how to manage and start up businesses. And to be close to my russian love.

Entering our Faculty...
That's it. That's it for the day really. I stayed home and finished some more exercises, read about the seminar the next day, proCATinated a bit, sent another barrage of love poems and messages to my princess and went to sleep late. I did take some pictures that day but I really liked this one.
 
Winter is coming!
It's seminar day. That means our discussion and debate day. I'm with the usual suspects, Marie, Sara, Erik and Paulo. I read an article regarding volcanoes and their effect to the extinction of species (dinosaurs anyone?). I ate 3 kanelbullars as usual. It was so funny. One of the teachers was typing messages on the iphone and the other was talking. When my article's turn came i spoke with confidence and vigor. I finished talking and those ignorant baboons (Holger and Jaime) barraged me with messages. Bastards!

Did i mention that in the morning we were supposed to do more GIS project work and i didn't go because i got struck by karma as usual and felt sick? And that those Top Gear-like friends sent me supporting messages saying that chechens broke my kneecaps? :D

Then i reluctantly went to the swedish class. Half of it was empty. I sad next to some boring german girls and some others. I was texting my love and Despoina to pass time. In the end it got interesting as we divided into groups and we asked the others questions about Sweden and Uppsala. We named our team IKEA and face off against Kanelbullar.

Back at home i played some ridiculous CS: Global Offensive on my super crap laptop with Holger and his friends. It was hilariously bad but fun. I kept sending more sweet goodnights to my Russian angel princess and dreamed about her all night long like a baby.

Landscapes to die for.
The beauty of this country is astounding. What better way to kickstart your day with such scenery, or simply the sun caressing your house gently? I sent another lovely message to princess (i need to find a nickname or i will keep repeating myself) and Marley tortured me for 20 minutes until i got to the GeoCentrum.

So beautiful...i wish she woke up next to me..
Holger was missing. It was his time to take Karma in the butt. He was sick with fever so it was me and Marie in the lab trying to tackle the watershed map that i mentioned in the beginning. We finished 2 hours earlier so i went home! Yay! Apparently my lack of silly content and adventures these days is covered by the fact that i have so many wonderful pictures to show!

I would swim there if it wasn't so cold :D
It's so hard not being able to express my self freely regarding my princess here. If you follow my blog and you know me, then you know who she is. I wrote her some beautiful things these days. From the heart. Let's just say she makes my heart warm, my pulse skyrockets and i want to get lost inside those magical eyes and smile.

Bleeding love..
She made me so happy yesterday. She told me she misses me and that i am a unique man with a heart of gold and  that she loves what i write. I could never ask for a better compliment. I want to care and protect her, her drive and fierce passion inspires me. We are destined for great things and i will put heart and soul into this baby, i promise you.

I had the best sleep since i arrived here. I told her that her words brought joy inside me and that i almost cried from happiness. Thank you. I also wrote some special love messages to my best lovely friend in Greece, Aggeliki who just turned 25 and i miss and love her very much, along with my other 2 babies, Athina and Katerina (<3). She replied in the morning being touched by my words. I am happy i have them. I wake up every day and i look at our photo and i feel them close to me.

Enough time to take a pretty picture outside my house.
Friday is upon us. I wake up 30 times and i have a lab exercise at 13:15. I have a shower and wear some fancy clothes, i expect to meet my angel hopefully. I get Marley and after 1 kilometer, while listening to my favorite tunes during the lyrics "Will you take me out of here when I'm staring down the barrel" Karma strikes again. I guess Marley took the lyrics seriously and decided to remove the chain from the pedals.

So there i am, bamboozled, confounded and miserable trying to fix the chain with my hands. Oh it was dirty. Where was this bike, in a mud pit? My hands are black, like my black black heart. I make my self to the university. I try to clean my hands. I am late for 30 minutes but i show the professor what happened while Jaime does the windmill laughing at me. We do some lab work involving chemistry and we try to melt down rocks by pouring acid on them.

First time in a lab after 6 years...
That's it for the day. We make some stupid stuff with Jaime and Marie, we buy some stuff from ICA and i go back home. Marley worked and tried to kill Jaime some times and throw him off the road. In the meantime a granny of 70 years old overtook us like Sebastian Vettel  almost throwing us off the bikes.

So here i am home, finishing papers, studying and sending the most loving messages ever imagined to my girl. She promised me to meet tomorrow. I hope we do, i miss her so much and i live for the 2-3 hours i see her each week. Until then i will pretend to hug her like a fluffy bunny. I did want to go with her to the "Dress like a cat party". I did not go because everything feels less fun without you my princess. But but but, i still have material for you to wrap this up! Because in Uppsala, the party never stops!

Meow?
Wow you hyena!
I will include one bonus picture from another era that i found disturbing before we all go to our cozy beds. Someone sent me this one, i didn't find it myself lol.

DAFUQ?
And that's it. 5 days in a nutshell. I though i wouldn't have much to write about, but i did. Nice! Until next time, please leave me a comment, support me, subscribe, share me or just like me! It's improtant for me and it keeps me going! We are approaching the 10000 viewers barrier soon! In the meantime...

Goodnight Sweden! Oh and princes....this is for you...

I will keep you safe because i care...